Why so proud?

#1
Replied to SicC, Hennessy, artisticgurl, Synful
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It's been a while. Firgured I'd drop something off here. I just wrote this earlier today.. Hope it's good, I haven't wrote anything in a few months now..

WHY SO PROUD?

Why so proud?

Your pride in a life of grief
These destructive streets
You make beats to rap of evil feats
Your soul won't retreat
From the pollution you breathe
The solution you need
Is to leave
And find the truth that you seek

Why so proud?

Your friend just got shot
Cuz he was on the wrong block
The glock lead the cops
To the drop
Where the crack and pot
Was sold by weight and rocks
To the same man that hopped on top
And became your childs Pop.

Why so proud?

16 years old with 2 kids
The truth is
Your life is through miss
You could choose bliss
But your too foolish
To move to new cribs
Stay in the hood and lose grip
Be proud and STUPID!
 

ArtsyGirl

Well-Known Member
#2
Nice! Very descriptive and it all flows really nice. Good drop ;)

Especially liked this:

Your friend just got shot
Cuz he was on the wrong block
The glock lead the cops
To the drop
Where the crack and pot
Was sold by weight and rocks
To the same man that hopped on top
And became your childs Pop.
 
#4
About time there was a reply lol. This place used to be packed full of great poets that shared and commented on eachothers poems. What happened?

Anyway, thanx to both of you for the replies.

Btw. is that you SoftStick :laugh:
 

keco52

Well-Known Member
Staff member
#5
I like the message but this rhyming scheme is numbing to the brain.

But I'm glad to see you here I was wondering about you and your baby that was born
 
#7
keco52 - Yea, it all depends on the way you read out.. I guess I could've put this in a better format. But in other news, I'm doing good. I have a great job as a web administrator at a local company. My son was born 4-11-06 (just like i said). He was born with a cleft lip but after one surgery when he was 3 1/2 months old, it was fixed. He's now a little over 8 months old. He's a great kid :)

S O F I - Yes sir I do have aim. xXJockaXx . It's hard to catch me on there. I work CONSTANTLY. As soon as I get my office though I'll be on more but right now the boss stands behind me and watches what I do.
 

keco52

Well-Known Member
Staff member
#8
Jocka said:
keco52 - Yea, it all depends on the way you read out.. I guess I could've put this in a better format. But in other news, I'm doing good. I have a great job as a web administrator at a local company. My son was born 4-11-06 (just like i said). He was born with a cleft lip but after one surgery when he was 3 1/2 months old, it was fixed. He's now a little over 8 months old. He's a great kid :)
Aww congrats on your aries baby...a born leader. :D I know a few ppl that were born with cleft lips...probably heart breaking to see him have to go thru pain but my friends that grew up and had surgery...you can't tell theyve had any surgery so that's not a problem. Happy to hear things are going good.
 
#9
he didn't seem to hurt when he had it. Actually, he got a little pissed off after the surgery because he was so used to eating with his cleft.

He was born on my wife's birthday. Do you know how hard it was to tell a woman squeezing a 7lb baby out of her crotch, happy birthday?
 
#10
this was real nice man, loved the whole single rhymes-per-paragraph idea... reminds me of ghostface killah for some reason :p

keep em commin!

peace.
 

Synful*Luv

Well-Known Member
Staff member
#11
Oh, I loved the message. I mean loved the message. I wish I could hug you for this. Tales of our confused youth in society turning into confused adults...
 
#12
damn realy nice, i especially like ur rhyming scheme, plus a great touching message, i like the scond part of the poem "you friend got shot...." real nice man
keep it up
 

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