Come On Back Home / 4 My Lil' Sista

Kadafi Son

Well-Known Member
#1
Been a while, but I'm back 2 drop. Sup everybody...

Even if you looked in a mirror you couldn't see what you are doin'
You only 15 years old and you choosin' to be crusin'
Lil' sista...what happen? You were the gentlest around
The streets turned you out, now you the rowdiest of the town
Tryin' so hard to be a G, but why at your age
The method of growin' up is bein' on tha right page
We both ain't had no daddy so I understand your frustration
I'm pacin' cuz I know that these street keep you chasin'-
A false dream. So won't you go back home to mama
A family has good times and sometimes it has drama
Remember when we was kids and you was always at my side
Now who knows what you doin' out there. Dead or Alive
I ain't seen you in months and I heard you prostitutin'
YOU FUCKIN' 15, LOOK AT WHAT THE HELL YOU DOIN'
I LOVE YOU. I MISS YOU. I'M IN COLLEGE AND YOU MISSIN'
Everybody tried to talk to you, but shit...you ain't listen
You grown. You know the anatomy of life
So you think it's safe for a lil' girl like you to stay out all night?!
I'm worried cuz you my only lil' baby sista
Slow your fast-ass down be4 more DRAMA come and get ya
This is ya bigga brotha callin'. Leave that fastlife alone
Mama, your 6 brothaz & sistaz and want you to come back home

4 My Lil Sista, Shadara a.k.a. Red
I Love You 2 Death...til next time
 

ArtsyGirl

Well-Known Member
#2
Strong piece, cant really say I felt like it dropped off in any part. Is this based on a true situation? Just wonderin dont have to answer.. (assuming it is by the name at the end..)

Favourite parts:

We both ain't had no daddy so I understand your frustration
I'm pacin' cuz I know that these street keep you chasin'-

-
Everybody tried to talk to you, but shit...you ain't listen
You grown. You know the anatomy of life
So you think it's safe for a lil' girl like you to stay out all night?!


It sounded reminiscent of a Pac song.. Good work.
 

Ivory$horty

†PoeticPrincess†
#3
Your pieces always have such depth and passion in them. Kind of reminds me of what mine used to be like but...I don't write all that much anymore. I guess that's probably why I don't wanna see sucha talent like yours go the same way.
This was another great piece...I can feel the sadness and the anger in it at the same time. I can't say I can relate too much to the situation but...I have a baby sister too so, I can put myself in your shoes.
Brilliant as always. Keep it up.
 

Kadafi Son

Well-Known Member
#4
Ivory$horty said:
Your pieces always have such depth and passion in them. Kind of reminds me of what mine used to be like but...I don't write all that much anymore. I guess that's probably why I don't wanna see sucha talent like yours go the same way.
This was another great piece...I can feel the sadness and the anger in it at the same time. I can't say I can relate too much to the situation but...I have a baby sister too so, I can put myself in your shoes.
Brilliant as always. Keep it up.
Thanx. I was beginning 2 think everybody 4got about poetry on this site, but thanx. By tha way, for artisticgurl, this is a real situation I'm dealin' with in my life. But thanx ya'll.

REMEMBER! LET BRING THIS FORUM UP
 
#5
Have 2 say i was feeling this piece , was good from start to finish

my fav part
A false dream. So won't you go back home to mama
A family has good times and sometimes it has drama


really like the way your lookin out for your lil sis keep it up
Much luv xx
 

The.Menace

Well-Known Member
Staff member
#6
Some rhymes are off and I do critizise that cause I know u can do way better man. cursin'/ doin' doesn't flow and the lines

I'm worried cuz you my only lil' baby sista
Slow your fast-ass down be4 more DRAMA come and get ya
don't flow neigther in my opinion.

peace.
 

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