Erase the Hate

#1
Here the newest song I wrote, I have 1 other thats done and another thats pretty close to being done which i haven't shown anyone on here yet, but I just had to show this song because its some of my best work. heres the beat that it goes to: http://rapidshare.de/files/5717272/shadowvilleproductions_trickles.mp3.html

Let me know your thoughts on it. I'm working on getting an album done, i have about 7 songs done which i think are pretty good hits and i'll have more to add onto that since i won't be able to record anything till my friend gets into production school in january.


Well I wake up to a warnin
Another typical morning
Outside freezin, heavy breathin
People fleein, bullets streamin
Children screamin, mothers grievin
Cops screenin crime scene seein
Onlookers leanin,
Tryin to figure out a reason
Why little homie deep in
A game that kills to reap ends
Once a blessed boy
Now a rap story beacon
Tried to sell weed on the weekend
But a dope friend saw a weaklin
Who couldn’t fight back if he was dreamin
Stole a whole O, damn he was fiendin
But as he turned his back
There was a click and a clack
Then the shatter of glass
Bullets missed his ass
The little homie careenin
Dope fiend was easin
Pull out his own with bullets head seekin
A shot to the dome, the druggie wasn’t weepin
He got the goods now
The lil homie in extinction
But death don’t reach him
He’s got drugs to please him


Chorus (2x)
Erase the hate erase the hate
Before bodies is buried
Better berate the hate
Discard the fear discard the fear
Incase corpses is cremated
Crave to clear the fear


I fall asleep to rhythm
Gun shots spittin
On beat like a metronome
On queue like a Capricorn
Everlastin like Jurassic bone
Flashin bastards nines in chrome
Boastins where the crime went wrong
Coastin till their time was gone
Cops around the corner
Ran and hid to flee the shit
Before they got greeted wit
A law upholding heated pig
Took a piece, began to spit
Brain blasted into bits
Please plead insanity
Say it couldn’t be
The man in thee
You wouldn’t kill a cop
To save a crime gone flop
Thought you were a g
But guess you not
Fear of something lesser
Turned into a stressor
Cause you like to shoot berrettas
Guess you felt some pleasure
Lifes in frustration
Cause life’s what you’re facin
How you like the consequences when a lifes been taken?


Chorus (2x)
Erase the hate erase the hate
Before bodies is buried
Better berate the hate
Discard the fear discard the fear
Incase corpses is cremated
Crave to clear the fear


Head to work for a payday
People screamin mayday
The streets is goin crazy
Cops is looking shady
Don’t like the way they
Behavin lately
Some could even say they
Need a checkin greatly
Now I know they jaded
Too many people faded
Cold hearts created
Don’t even need to state it
Cause its understood
Anywhere in the hood
Expect the unexpected
Keep your ass protected
And you might become the blessed
Few who live to express it
Through a song to rep it
No matter how depressin
Glorify the struggle
No need to keep it subtle
Bust them bastards bubble
That want us to be muzzled
Keep us stuck in the hussle
Show that bitch your knuckles
Turn his face into a puzzle
We’re tryin to get out the scuffle
Show a little muscle
Show the world our tussle

Chorus (2x)
Erase the hate erase the hate
Before bodies is buried
Better berate the hate
Discard the fear discard the fear
Incase corpses is cremated
Crave to clear the fear
 

ARon

Well-Known Member
#5
Truthfully your flow is too humpty dumpty. Just watchin taht Rev Run shit and Russel Simmons was tellin dude same thing, thats why I said Humpty Dumpty.

Outside freezin, heavy breathin
People fleein, bullets streamin
Children screamin, mothers grievin
Cops screenin crime scene seein
Onlookers leanin,
Tryin to figure out a reason


Like this. When you say this the flow is corny.

But its a nice song, some good lines I could like it if it sounds right. Peace.
 

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