But you're so quick to jump the gun and make conclusions based on your own filtered way of seeing the world that you have neglected a series of questions you should have asked yourself in search of understanding what truly happened to your friend. I'm willing to bet a hundred million trillion dollars that your friend was miserable and his life was heading nowhere. If it hadn't been WoW, it would have been heroin, working late at the office, going to a pub every day by his self and ordering the same shit every night and then going home and watching tv for 30 minutes before going to sleep and waking up to another pointless day. People don't do shit just because. There's always an explanation, and it's most often way more complex than people think. Maybe his WoW friends treated him better and with more respect than his real friends, or maybe he just felt like he could identify more with them because they more so shared his interests and his way of thinking than you and his other friends.
As for why it takes a life over, I can actually lend a few thoughts there. These are all theories of mine and so forth, but if ever there was something I really wanted to do, it was to write a doctor's degree about this shit or something. One day maybe.
Human social structure is based on ranks. We have the expression "alpha-male" which describes the type of person who receives a lot of social attention. It's a dynamic relationship where the attention he receives fuels his confidence, while his confidence fuels other people's desire to give him attention. The leader of the pack. Now from a nature point of view, those that fall behind, the insecure and weird ones, they don't make it. Our advanced social structure and our technological capabilities have enabled us to strive for the ideal that everyone is equal. I don't know how an alpha-male is selected in nature. I guess it's what's boggling every animal behavior researcher's mind to this day. It's just something that happens. Presumably it's an aesthetic thing, thus, a genetic thing. You are genetically predestined to be an alpha-male or a weak follower. I truly believe so, but whether or not it's actually so is irrelevant in the point I'm gonna make anyway.
If you, in depth, take in this distinction between alpha-male type people and non-alpha male type humans, and the equivalent distinction among women, you can make further distinctions/comparisons. We can take the distinction between physically fit people with good coordinating skills (stereotypically the "brute"), and the people with less physical agility, but more intellect (stereotypically the math club geek). Then there's all kinds of layers of gray in between the two. If you look at how this second distinction relates to the distinction between alpha male characters and "weaklings", you'll find that the weaklings are often the ones in the math club. The alpha males are often the ones on the football team. I know I am being overly stereotypical, but I'm doing so for the sake of the point that's coming somewhere down the line here.
Some people just won't understand that the notion that you can be whatever you want is a flawed notion. You can't. The only correct way to describe where you might go in life is to say that you will be what you will be. People that think they control their future are most often proven wrong. You may be able to control a certain aspect, but it's common knowledge that you grow up to find that nothing is what you thought it would be. Everyone have these experiences every day.
I am not predestined for physical greatness. I can work out, but my body is not cut out of athletics. I have a bad knee due to an injury, and then later minor injuries in the same knee. Due to lack of workout over a substantial period in my life, my knee will never fully recover, and I will always struggle with knee pains. Due to heavy abuse of marijuana I have a frail body. I'm sensitive to bodily discomforts, because when you're high there's few of those. You sweat less, you have less chilling sensations. You get butterflies in your tummy, and those are awesome.
I sidestepped for a second there, but back to WoW. I was never great at sports. I was never great at social dating. I am not very confident around girls because between what I've read in magazines, what I've seen on TV, and what I've heard different girls say, I no longer know what the fuck a girl wants to hear. So I have stopped trying to get with girls. Maybe that was my problem before, I tried too hard, and maybe that shit will change. But as my life stands right now, I got nothing. I'm told I'm a cool person, and people like to hang out with me because I'm easygoing - people easily fall into their comfort zone while hanging out with me, because I have felt judged my whole life and therefore try to behave in a way that's non threatening and non prejudice.
I had a whole girlfriend experience (the irony in my choice of words is astounding from my point of view, but I'm not gonna bore you with why) that went down the crapper, and in hindsight I realized a lot of things about myself and about that relationship. Either way, the breakup plunged me into a depression where I got taken right back to four years ago when I was in love with my best friend's girlfriend, and we were both fat but he suddenly became skinny and a player and I fell in his shadow and felt like a fat ugly loser. I also felt very betrayed, I felt angry, I felt misunderstood, I was too much of a chicken to talk to someone about it so I harbored my feelings. In the middle of all this, I started playing World of Warcraft...
Now let me explain why World of Warcraft is so popular, and let me try and explain to those who never played it before how the people who do play it relate to it. There's various degrees of playing the game. In-game, we use terms "casuals" and "hardcores". I'm gonna get back to that, after I explain how the game works in simple terms.
You select a "realm" which is like a server to play on, and you create a character on that server. When you create a character, you pick one of two factions. Both factions have five different species of beings that have different properties, and after selecting a race you can also select a class. Faction and race choices are (almost) entirely preference based/aesthetic, class choice is what really matters. There is about 10 classes or so. Some are damage-dealers and use ranged weaponry or magic to deal damage. Some are healing classes, and use healing spells to heal team mates. Some are melee warriors. There is a rogue class, whose speciality is to stealth up behind an enemy and keep them stunned from behind (sounds kinky eh?

).
You start leveling your character by doing "quests" and killing "mobs". "Mobs" are essentially creatures everywhere in the world that are non-player controlled. If you kill one, another will spawn in its place a few minutes later. The quests are given to you by non-player controlled characters. The world of Warcraft is divided into regions, and each region is divided into sub-areas. In each area you will normally find some sort of settlement, a castle, a village, some tents, and there's normally non-player characters there. They give you quests that yield experience points, you gain levels and start getting more and more abilities.
When you reach top level you have a total of about 20-40 abilities. To use an example, I play a hunter class. Hunters stand at range and use bows or guns to do damage, and they also have a pet that they can control. In a fight with another player I will frequently use over 20 abilities that I have bound to different keys on my keyboard. Anyway, at top level (which is level 80 at the moment), the game changes. Since you no longer have to do quests for experience points to raise your level, the game now changes to becoming a numbers game where you go in groups of 5, 10 or 25 players. These groups travel into instanced dungeons (which means that you enter a portal and bam, you're inside a dungeon. If someone else enter the same portal they also enter the dungeon, but a very own instance of that same dungeon is created for the other group so the two groups don't run into each other). In these dungeons you fight bosses that drop gear items. Shoulderpads, chest pieces, swords, bows, gems and dragon scales that you can use to forge armor with, etc. Each boss you kill drops a limited number of items that are picked from a pool of possible items, and when a group of people go there together and down a boss there's like a lottery aspect to it. Will I get item X tonight or won't I, that kind of excitement. The point is, you're no longer playing a role-playing game. You're no longer doing quests for some king and becoming a grand crusader or some other bullshit that won't matter. You can either start a new character of a different class and continue playing casually, or you can start raiding. "Raiding" is a term which basically means, you group with people. In the game's own user interface, these groups are referred to as "raids".
End-game raiding is quite different to what you see when you see your friends playing WoW. Most people that do end-game raiding do so in solitude, for it truly is a demanding task. I don't know what it was like before, cause Duke and Chronic both played back in the days when raids consisted of 40 players instead of 25, and from a management side of things that was quite a bit different. But today, end-game raiding is mentally challenging. You aren't spamming buttons Tekken style. You can't brute your way through things, you need to coordinate and think and use your brain. You need to react to things fast. Certain elements of boss fights are random in nature, and you need to be able to adapt to changes that occur during boss encounters on the fly, or you don't cut it.
Obviously, coordinating something like this for 10 or even 25 players is a massive task. I personally orchestrate 10-man raids at least once a week. We use voice communication and I am the one that explains tactics to the group. If someone has to do a specific job, I assign those people and so forth. I distribute the items that we get from bosses we kill, and I motivate the group while also keeping them in line and disciplining them.
I'll explain the mechanics of a boss encounter just so you get an idea of what you have to think about. There is a boss called Hodir. He is based off of Northern mythos (although not sure what God exactly), and he is powerful within the element of frost magic. The whole fight and all it's mechanics are based on frost/ice.
- During the fight, a mark is put on any player that stands still for 1.0 seconds. This mark takes about 500 health from the player. If the player continues to stand still for another 1.0 seconds, the first mark receives one extra stack and this time does 1000 damage to the player. For each extra second you stand still, a mark stacks on you, and the damage you take per second doubles. To be cured of this mark, you need to be in movement for 1.0 seconds for every stack of the mark that is currently on your character. The solution is to always keep moving.
- The boss himself hits like a truck. The way raids are built up is, you normally have one melee class whose armor is the kind that boosts his health and not his damage. This person's job is to generate what is called "threat" from the boss. Every time a person uses a spell, the boss registers an amount of "threat" from that player. The boss will keep attacking the person who has the most threat. Some melee classes have abilities that do huge loads of threat in one hit, and they act as "tanks" - they stand there and eat damage while healers spam their buttons and keep healing them even when they are at full health. Because bosses can kill a tank with two hits in a row. You can't ever not heal the tank for a second. Consider this with the fact that you always have to keep moving, and that some spells require you to stand still to use.
- The boss occasionally gains something called "Frozen Blows", which makes him hit for even more damage, while every member of the group also takes damage equal to about 10% of their full health, each second, for 20 seconds. Meaning they die twice and 3 people have to heal the other 7 while also ALWAYS keeping the tank at full health.
- The boss has an enrage timer. If you take more than X minutes to beat him, he goes into enrage mode and is unbeatable and will kill you all in seconds. This mechanic is there to ensure that players are able to substain a good enough DPS (damage per second) throughout the fight. The reason for this is, if they could take forever then the other mechanics like having to move all the time would be easy to counter, you could just safe it and take your time with it. The healers are pressured by the Frozen Blows damage and the damage to the tank, the DPS is pressured by the limited time they have to do X damage. The tanks are pressured by having to position the boss correctly at all times, and to do enough threat. Some times, when the tanks are bad and the DPS is very high, the threat generated from the damage-doers makes the boss turn and run for one of them instead. This usually results in a failed attempt, so managing your threat is another aspect of every encounter that you need to take into account.
- My DPS rotation is a priority rotation. I have about 10 abilities I frequently use in boss fights, and I have to spam the next one while I'm casting one to make sure I keep my DPS numbers high enough that we can beat the boss. Some abilities need 10 seconds to cool off before being usable again, some abilities need 6 seconds, some need 30. Some abilities work as such that they mark the boss with a mark that makes you do more damage to the boss while that mark is on the boss, and considering the way certain abilities need to cool down, I need to make quick choices to maximize my damage output. While always being on the move.
- Another part of this encounter are iceblocks that fall from the roof of the cave the boss is located in. You see a shadow on the floor for 2 seconds and then an iceblock hits. So while always moving, you also need to watch where you move.
- Inside the room where the boss is there are 4 non-player controlled characters frozen in ice blocks. If you break the ice blocks, the NPCs help your group out. This is a key part of the encounter as you likely won't beat it without the help of these frozen NPCs. Every 45 seconds, the boss does an ability called Flash Freeze. What happens is, two huge iceblocks fall in random locations in the cave and leave snow mounds where they land. Once they hit the ground, you have two seconds to get into the mound. Whoever isn't in a snow mound gets frozen into a block of ice, like the NPCs that were there once you enter the room - the ones you keep freeing. The NPCs you freed always get frozen in ice, so you need to free them again every 45 seconds. While staying out of iceblocks falling from the sky, while always moving and never standing still too long, by positioning yourself correctly and being in range of healers so they can reach you and keep you alive, and while keeping up your DPS rotation.
The point is, this isn't Super Mario. It's tactical play.
It's a game, like soccer. The "computer" part, I don't understand. Previous in my post I tried to make a distinction between people that are good at sports and people that are good at technical things like what I just described. Have it ever occured to you that people like me can never be good at the stuff that you consider cool enough that you would let yourself be seen doing it? Ever occured to you that playing a game and having to lead 10 people and coordinate my movement with theirs from a mental point of view is more stimulating to me than running around on a football field being an asshole and bumping into everyone trying to make them fall over and make it look like they fell so I can get the ball and score a goal and be hot crap for a minute, is just more fun for me?
The reason people don't understand what it is about WoW that draws people in is, people don't understand that people are different, and they are unwilling to try and understand. Let's face it, we all have enough shit to deal with in our lives, we don't need one more cause to fight for. I bet that's how everyone feels. But WoW isn't just a game, and it's not the fact that I'm a knight in shining armor that's giving me a boner that makes me play the game. I enjoy the story elements of the game like I enjoyed Lord of the Rings, but make no mistake about it, I thrive under the pressure of having to do a bunch of shit. And I'm good at it. I'm almost renowned on my server for making good pick-up groups, and I'm a talented player. I'm also very intuitive, so I find new ways to do things that repeatedly yielded reactions of muse. Why do you have to put me down when I'm being good at something I enjoy (which you may take for granted being super-awesome, but is rare to me)?