Misery & Me: Prologue

#1
I havent written in a year so im a bit rusty but let me know what you think.


I encountered her on a cold & stormy afternoon
the leaves gently fell as her season began to go into full bloom
she danced circles around me, in a manner that was delightful
for she had mastered the art of disguise, knowing otherwise she would be greeted in a manner that could be called spiteful

Thus like two lonely strangers in the midst of the night
the two of us spiralled down into a darker tone of light
and never did things seem any clearer
I liken the events of that night to falling in love with a fuhrer

That only goes to show you can fall for anything when you are weak and feeble minded
but at the time neither of us had seemed to mind it

At this time the snow began to glisten and fall more frequently
all the while she continued to meet me secretly
to the point where i believed she was the one that needed me
obviously her mental capacity had exceeded me

Upon realization, I plotted my exit strategy
unaware that what would ultimately follow would be tragedy

To Be Continued....
 
#2
hey, Im really feelin this, ur flows a lil off in some places but its all good, ur imagry in ur writing is awsome...

"Thus like two lonely strangers in the midst of the night
the two of us spiralled down into a darker tone of light
and never did things seem any clearer


That only goes to show you can fall for anything when you are weak and feeble minded
but at the time neither of us had seemed to mind it"

^^Mad work overall.. dont like to pick poems apart, but i really liked those lines, keep it up, look foward to readin more.

pz
 
#3
very nice poem. my favorite part.

Thus like two lonely strangers in the midst of the night
the two of us spiralled down into a darker tone of light
and never did things seem any clearer
I liken the events of that night to falling in love with a fuhrer

finish up the second part of it. i wanna see
 

Kadafi Son

Well-Known Member
#5
Maybe it was just me, but I couldn't quite capture the 2nd half of this piece. But anywayz, the structure and and rhyme scheme you got are great. You really need to continue this though, so i can elaborate better on this
 

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