mission statement

[fisherM.A.N.]

replies: lost hope, god take me now, untitled 2

my first poem posted on this board.. feedback much appreciated.. thnx..

Mission Statement:

Never will you find one as faithful as He.
It's because of Him that I'm able to see.
I'm so grateful to be in the position I'm in.
The addition of Him equals omission of sin.
Let my mission begin: being a witness to men,
to mention to them how Christ had risen again.
Jesus the Son was given to mend, sent to repair;
the cross was the burden He was set up to bear.
A sentence unfair, He from death was not spared,
but "Forgive them," with a last breath He declared.
Don't fret or despair, for His resurrection is shared.
Our trip to heaven's prepared; He's getting us there.
But let's be aware of what is required of us,
and acknowledge we are really no higher than dust.
Retire the lust; the earthly things we desire will rust.
Acquire what's just, lest you in the fire combust.
Before we expire we must live our lives for Christ.
Keep our eyes on right so we're not by lies enticed.
The blameless life of Christ is what the Bible cites,
as the type of life that follows God's design precise.
Will you decide on Christ or will you defer?
What do you prefer? Life? Or do you choose to burn?

~1~

 

[kman_69]

Mad right flow on this....your style of writing is kinda similar to my own...

basically what ur saying with this peice is "beleive in God, or go to Hell" ...which is cool and everything, and its great to write about your faith....just somehow this comes out a little preachy..

very well written though, im still feelin it...hope 2 see more from u

peace.

 

[Belo]

ThAt was cool.. although I'm not really into religion so the topic itself didn't interest me a whole lot
Liked the rhyming you used.. made it flow real nice
Was a great 1st poem.. good 2 see another new name in here..
Keep up the good work
Peace

 

[~live2tell~]

Its good to see you writing about your own beliefs so strongly, your poem came across as confident and powerful, your choice of rhythm and words were good and descriptive and held my attention. Good solid piece of writing, I enjoyed the read.

 

[Cown]

Really liked the subject you have chosen to bring up in this poem. It's different to whatelse I've seen posten in this forum, but still a very good poem. People need to think more about what Christ actually went through and maybe even concider to believe it they are non-believers.

Really nice piece :thumb:

 

[fisherM.A.N.]

kman- thanx for ur comments.. yeah, u understood perfectly the jist of it.. and yes, i realize that it might sound "preachy".. but it is what it is..

belo- im glad that ur were able to enjoy my poem despite not being interested in its topic..

sarah- i do hold on to my beliefs very strong (or else what are "beliefs" and "faith" really?) and im glad that ur were able to recognize that by reading my poem.. thanx..

cown- i agree that my poem contrasts a great deal with what others typically post on this forum.. i decided to post this not to shove my beliefs into anyone's face (because that usually turns people off to what u have to say), but instead i present what i believe to those who read so as to allow them to consider objectively what im saying.. thanx for the comments..

once again, i appreciate everyone's comments (and hope to receive more comments), and i thank those who took the time to read, even if they did not choose to comment.. the feedback i got encourages me to continue posting my poems.. so expect more from me in the near future..

~1~

 

[fisherM.A.N.]

upping

 

[fisherM.A.N.]

upping again