Seasons Question?

[kman_69]

i guess this peice could be considered a little abstract, but hopefully it makes sense still...

let me know what u think.


Seasons Question? -5th October 2005
theres a question thats been progressively messin with me
coz im not sure if she'll think less of me 4 questioning things
-see, im not messin when i mention that i might love her
..but is that enough? i mean, what'll happen come summer?
-n' other than that, spring is slowly steppin towards an end
which makes me realise..i really respect her as a friend
..and, i cant pretend like autumn wasn't something special
-coz its when we met, and its when i first got next 2 you
..im tellin you.. coz i really fear the winter rains
..its all i hear.. so maybe you could hint or explain?..
..coz im tryna figure out.. "WHY..do the seasons change"?

 

[Jocka]

not one reply? This was kinda deep. Pain revealed in words with all the questions we wonder.. real nice job on this, really.

 

[Jurhum]

i guess this peice could be considered a little abstract, but hopefully it makes sense still...

let me know what u think.


Seasons Question? -5th October 2005
theres a question thats been progressively messin with me
coz im not sure if she'll think less of me 4 questioning things
-see, im not messin when i mention that i might love her
..but is that enough? i mean, what'll happen come summer?
-n' other than that, spring is slowly steppin towards an end
which makes me realise..i really respect her as a friend
..and, i cant pretend like autumn wasn't something special
-coz its when we met, and its when i first got next 2 you
..im tellin you.. coz i really fear the winter rains
..its all i hear.. so maybe you could hint or explain?..
..coz im tryna figure out.. "WHY..do the seasons change"?

nice as always... one thing that i found interesting how you shifted from third person to second person.. was that intended?
other then that.. the whole peiece was great... u know, always loving ur writing man...

 

[kman_69]

thanks man, yeah it was intended...coz it was written for my girl...so i wanted her to know it was about her on the autumn line..sorta thing...and also, i thought the darker lines worked better in first person....if that makes sense?

thanks for peepin anyways man!

 

[kman_69]

not one reply? This was kinda deep. Pain revealed in words with all the questions we wonder.. real nice job on this, really.

yo man, thanks heaps! that means a lot....glad u feelin this one!

thanks for your reply too!

peace!

 

[Helena]

im feelin this..its deep

 

[kman_69]

thanks for peepin helena

 

[Kadafi Son]

Eh, I haven't posted on the site in a real LONG TIME. My computer crashed and the only time I can get on is when I'm at other person comp.

But anyway, I gotta say Kman_69 this was a unique kind of poem because of the way you used the seasons to sort of relate to your pain. Keep dat up. Peace and Luv

 

[Bender]

I no Bard but: good theme, and use of 'Meter'! That is what stands out to me about this poem. Your arrangement of words is well structured.

 

[kman_69]

hey thanks for the feedback guys!...glad u feelin it...really appreciate you peepin this!

peace!

 

[~live2tell~]

Good drop and I’m sure a lot of people can relate.

Liked how this was a lil different to your other poetry too – keep it up :thumb: