The Plan

[kman_69]

i woulda replied to more posts...but i couldn't find anymore that i hadn't already replied to...

ah i guess read this peice like im tellin u the story/askin for your help to figure things out....coz i kinda am...


The Plan -20th April 2005
is it healthy to be pissed off for days?
in a way i kinda feel like im goin insane
..either way i know what the stories about..
but maybe you could help me to try figure it out?

see theres this BITCH i know, that decided to hurt me
she had a plan to go, and it was executed superbly
first she lured me into thinkin we were still together
a night of love and kisses like "this is forever"
..whatever it was, i didnt even think for a second
-that the second part of her plan would be so inventive
she met me the next day right in front of my house
which seemed a little odd.. coz she lives way out
she gave me a hug, and told me she was meeting a friend
"would you walk me to meet em?" -is what she said
next thing i know shes running off to some guy -i see
"maybe i'll call u later, but i think u better leave"
-speechless i stood there, feelin kinda sick..
as the two of them kissed and decided what movie to pick
"what a fuckin BITCH" i said as i walked off in anger
rage and depression filled my head from different angles
-i felt kind of entangled in a web of her deceit..
just walking around kinda made it hard for me to breathe
i mean i wouldnt even dream of trying to hurt her, EVER!
..but she went out of her way to hurt me on another level
its seems so incredible.. but uh, never the less..
her plan worked, and its left me feelin like a mess..
im stressed out as shit.. but i know one thing thats right
-shes just a fuckin BITCH!.. and im just way too nice.

 

[MX Red]

Well ill give you one thing, she is a bitch - but i wouldnt suggest revenge, whats the point?

Anyway, flow was kinda off at times, but still good.

next thing i know shes running off to some guy -i see
"maybe i'll call u later, but i think u better leave"
-speechless i stood there, feelin kinda sick..

Fav bit, simply because it reminds me of something that happened to me, nothing as brutal as happened to you, but kinda the same ending, and sick is exactly how i felt.

Anyway gotta ask - did she do this randomly or had you done summing?
peace
MX!

 

[Jurhum]

Fuck her. Just another whore. Just think of it that way, anyway, poem was dope. very visual.

do you know why she did that?

 

[kman_69]

Well ill give you one thing, she is a bitch - but i wouldnt suggest revenge, whats the point?

Anyway, flow was kinda off at times, but still good.

next thing i know shes running off to some guy -i see
"maybe i'll call u later, but i think u better leave"
-speechless i stood there, feelin kinda sick..

Fav bit, simply because it reminds me of something that happened to me, nothing as brutal as happened to you, but kinda the same ending, and sick is exactly how i felt.

Anyway gotta ask - did she do this randomly or had you done summing?
peace
MX!

thanks man, yeah its about the worste feeling in the world ay? :/ -think id prefer a kick to the head or something...

and yeah its pretty random as far as i can tell, i mean she broke up with me originally a few weeks ago coz she said i spent "too much time with my friends" -which i found a bit rediculous, but yeah i didnt think it warranted this....what im tryna figure out why anyone would do such a thing? -especially some1 i loved so much, ya know what i mean?..

 

[kman_69]

Fuck her. Just another whore. Just think of it that way, anyway, poem was dope. very visual.

do you know why she did that?

ah thanks man, glad u feelin it...

but yeah, i got no idea why...thats kinda why i wrote this....to see if u guys could help me try figure it out...coz its drivin me kinda nuts..

 

[Jurhum]

The best thing is to forget about her, if you are sure you didn't do her wrong. Just as if she didn't exist. As if she isn't worth your time. Honestly, you have to control your emotions and how to let them out.

 

[~live2tell~]

You definitely need to start getting this girl out of your system thats for sure and I think this poem is a very good start at doing that

Especially like the first verse kinda how you introduce your story thought that was different and worked well in this piece.

You used good expression and this made it really interesting to read and get a full picture of what happened and how you must have felt.

I also liked how you ended it - definitely on a positive note! :thumb:

 

[kman_69]

yeah ur right sara, i think this poems a good start....

ah yeah, glad u liked the introduction too...i thought it was a diff idea...

thanks for peepin, glad u feelin it

peace!

 

[Missy "C"]

Nice work kman! I like the fact that you're telling a story, and it sounds so natural, the rhymes are great. It's original, it's not another melancholic and sad poem about losing a girl, it's very positive. I loved the ending of course, but there's another verse that I liked very much:

i felt kind of entangled in a web of her deceit..
just walking around kinda made it hard for me to breathe

It's very entertaining, I enjoyed reading it a lot :thumb:

 

[kman_69]

thanks Missy ....glad u feelin this one.... yeah i tried to keep it positive as possible considering the situation...i figure theres no use complaining about being heart broke...

thanks again!

peace.

 

[dedbrd]

nice poem, i have been through this before too, and i kind of took it as her way of telling me (in a strange way that hurt) that she still loved me (the love the previous night) but she is trying to move on and wanted me to see it(meeting the new guy with me there)...but it was a good poem, and i bet you felt better after writing it, and i bet you smiled the first time you read it back to yourself

 

[C.A.P 23]

yo, mi really feeling this kman...well written and easily readable..tragic story though..
remember that,revenge is so very sweet..

 

[kman_69]

debrd: yeah thanks man, it hurts like hell ay?...glad u feelin this...and yeah i smile reading the poem now..

CAP: haha thanks, yeah im not really into revenge much....i figure the universe will set things straight....im movin on anway

peace.

 

[liz]

Kinda left me speechless which is hard to do, glad u have moved on.

Nice the way you were able to put your feelings into words hoped it helped.

liz

 

[kman_69]

thanks liz ....it did help a lot, lol speechless huh?...well im glad u feelin it..

thanks a lot!

peace.