~hey guys wats up, well its been a while since ive visited this sight let alone dropped anything... Those who no my work would no that i have the tendacy 2 produce some really long pieces, this was 1 of them i actually shortened it but its still turned out long... the length of this could turn people away n thats expected but like always to those who take the time 2 read this n reply its greatly appreciated... bringin it bak 2 the old PJ... Brat 
When I’m Alone…
When I’m alone n I don’t wanna talk 2 anyone
Will u still be there even if this is what I did become
If I show u who I am, if I sho u the real me
… Close ur eyes just hear me, I can’t bare 4 u 2 c…
I’m gona cry unconditionally my mind will shut down
Slowly I’m gona end, n my eyes will chase the ground
I’ll count every last stone that interferes with my steps
An empty shado – I don’t know what’ll happen next
But as I start 2 imagine a life after 2moro
I wonder if I’ll always remain this hollo
So empty, so meaningless, at some stage I was mislead
Taken down a path that leads me straight 2 death
As I take another breath the air gets tighter in my chest
Like I wasn’t meant 2 live, not like this anyway
I seriously have no choice left in life but 2 pray
Talk 2 who’s listening, whoever’s up there
Whoever’s in charge – I guess whoever cares…
I can’t control my mind, or the thoughts that run thru
Coz I only wanna fall so much more, I no I’m hurting u
Hurting everybody around me, it’s my own stupid mistake
But I swear 2 u on everything what I’m writing isn’t fake…
I’m gona pure my heart 4 all 2 c – graffitied in crimson red
On my soul u’ll c it clear but surprisingly I’m not dead
Not yet anyway, only felt like that coz I’m high
If I apologize, promise me u wont question why
Coz I done wanna lie, I can’t justify wat I do
I can’t say anything more, coz it gets me thru
Don’t u notice when I smile, my eyes they burn
N I try 2 change, but I never learn
I’m weak inside I told u this – u didn’t wana believe
I showed u just how much by drugs u were deceived
Everything u saw on the surface – everything u thought I was
Is bullshit – was all fake n it was all because
I was made a different person, made 2 be strong
Lost within, but I was taught 2 belong
In a society that couldn’t understand my breed
A cursed seed who can’t help but bleed
Coz I have 2 look in the mirror n c wat I c
Exactly wat u can’t, I can c me
Thru every last day that came n went
All the times I tried n I couldn’t defend
Now all these walls r up – built after all these years
I can hide within, breakdown – n release these tears
Thru the eyes u thought could never cry
N can u handle my body shaking like I’m about2 die
When u look at my face n u get no reaction
N when u hold me n u feel that there’s no detection
Of life within me, but u’ll c the dead walking
Laughing n all that – u’ll hear the dead talking
Coz u’ll be there with me, but I wont be there with u
Physically yeah I will be, but emotionally I never made it thru
Think of how weird it is when u can c the dead breathing
The circle of life itself is mis-leading
Intriguing, but deceiving I just showed u me
Everything u need 2 c is printed 4 u clearly
Judge wat u can but understand the pain
Feel wat u want, but at least feel the same
As I did just so u can understand were I’ve been
Wat I’ve seen n 2 this moment where I just wanna dream…
In reality u can’t c me falling apart
Can’t c my confusion tearing straight thru my heart
All I’ve ever wanted 2 say – how do I say?
How can I prove or ever sho u that I never meant 2 turn out this way…?
I saw u looking at me, ur eyes catching mine
Previously I drew a line so that no1 could define
The different lives I lead – I just don’t wanna hurt u
I couldn’t live with myself n u just don’t have a clue
I shut myself from the gentle touch I need
Tho I no ur happy – my spirit still fucking bleeds
Reality sho’s me exactly wat I missed
No logic no reason. I understood with fists
The whole time my whole life I’m the 1 who saw
Who felt the impact, but I just wanted more
As much as I could take, coz I felt so sensitized
I was alive, I survived – look at my eyes
I died n I cried, I had 2 lie – I had 2 much pride
N I’m sorry I had 2 sho u who I am inside
Who I hide ~ … The reality u just don’t know
The 4gotten emotions that I never let go
Day after day n on that coldest night
Somewhere in my soul I no wats wrong n right
Thru the flames in winter – that claimed me deceased
2 the snow that fell in winter ~ That day I almost felt peace…
When I’m alone n I don’t wanna talk 2 anyone
Will u still me there even if this is wat I did become
I will sho u who I am if u can bare 2 c
Now open ur eyes n take a look….
~* my hearts in my hand, n I’m giving u me.

When I’m Alone…
When I’m alone n I don’t wanna talk 2 anyone
Will u still be there even if this is what I did become
If I show u who I am, if I sho u the real me
… Close ur eyes just hear me, I can’t bare 4 u 2 c…
I’m gona cry unconditionally my mind will shut down
Slowly I’m gona end, n my eyes will chase the ground
I’ll count every last stone that interferes with my steps
An empty shado – I don’t know what’ll happen next
But as I start 2 imagine a life after 2moro
I wonder if I’ll always remain this hollo
So empty, so meaningless, at some stage I was mislead
Taken down a path that leads me straight 2 death
As I take another breath the air gets tighter in my chest
Like I wasn’t meant 2 live, not like this anyway
I seriously have no choice left in life but 2 pray
Talk 2 who’s listening, whoever’s up there
Whoever’s in charge – I guess whoever cares…
I can’t control my mind, or the thoughts that run thru
Coz I only wanna fall so much more, I no I’m hurting u
Hurting everybody around me, it’s my own stupid mistake
But I swear 2 u on everything what I’m writing isn’t fake…
I’m gona pure my heart 4 all 2 c – graffitied in crimson red
On my soul u’ll c it clear but surprisingly I’m not dead
Not yet anyway, only felt like that coz I’m high
If I apologize, promise me u wont question why
Coz I done wanna lie, I can’t justify wat I do
I can’t say anything more, coz it gets me thru
Don’t u notice when I smile, my eyes they burn
N I try 2 change, but I never learn
I’m weak inside I told u this – u didn’t wana believe
I showed u just how much by drugs u were deceived
Everything u saw on the surface – everything u thought I was
Is bullshit – was all fake n it was all because
I was made a different person, made 2 be strong
Lost within, but I was taught 2 belong
In a society that couldn’t understand my breed
A cursed seed who can’t help but bleed
Coz I have 2 look in the mirror n c wat I c
Exactly wat u can’t, I can c me
Thru every last day that came n went
All the times I tried n I couldn’t defend
Now all these walls r up – built after all these years
I can hide within, breakdown – n release these tears
Thru the eyes u thought could never cry
N can u handle my body shaking like I’m about2 die
When u look at my face n u get no reaction
N when u hold me n u feel that there’s no detection
Of life within me, but u’ll c the dead walking
Laughing n all that – u’ll hear the dead talking
Coz u’ll be there with me, but I wont be there with u
Physically yeah I will be, but emotionally I never made it thru
Think of how weird it is when u can c the dead breathing
The circle of life itself is mis-leading
Intriguing, but deceiving I just showed u me
Everything u need 2 c is printed 4 u clearly
Judge wat u can but understand the pain
Feel wat u want, but at least feel the same
As I did just so u can understand were I’ve been
Wat I’ve seen n 2 this moment where I just wanna dream…
In reality u can’t c me falling apart
Can’t c my confusion tearing straight thru my heart
All I’ve ever wanted 2 say – how do I say?
How can I prove or ever sho u that I never meant 2 turn out this way…?
I saw u looking at me, ur eyes catching mine
Previously I drew a line so that no1 could define
The different lives I lead – I just don’t wanna hurt u
I couldn’t live with myself n u just don’t have a clue
I shut myself from the gentle touch I need
Tho I no ur happy – my spirit still fucking bleeds
Reality sho’s me exactly wat I missed
No logic no reason. I understood with fists
The whole time my whole life I’m the 1 who saw
Who felt the impact, but I just wanted more
As much as I could take, coz I felt so sensitized
I was alive, I survived – look at my eyes
I died n I cried, I had 2 lie – I had 2 much pride
N I’m sorry I had 2 sho u who I am inside
Who I hide ~ … The reality u just don’t know
The 4gotten emotions that I never let go
Day after day n on that coldest night
Somewhere in my soul I no wats wrong n right
Thru the flames in winter – that claimed me deceased
2 the snow that fell in winter ~ That day I almost felt peace…
When I’m alone n I don’t wanna talk 2 anyone
Will u still me there even if this is wat I did become
I will sho u who I am if u can bare 2 c
Now open ur eyes n take a look….
~* my hearts in my hand, n I’m giving u me.
Im writing right now [just saw that U recently posted so I had 2 stop by] so Ill check this out after that. Take care baby girl!
Words as usual convey great emotion and I can feel U on a lot of them issues.