Your Dream

Pittsey

Knock, Knock...
Staff member
#21
I never had a dream anyway. But having children does change everything. IMO for the better.

Everyday I look for ways to stick more information in my sons head. He loves to learn and I love teaching him. He knows all his shapes. Knew his alphabet at 18 months. I want him to achieve more than me academically. That is sort of my dream.
 

masta247

Well-Known Member
Staff member
#22
For a lot of people, personal hopes and dreams are love and raising a family. I completely understand that and would never think it's silly even though I can't picture myself raising a family even ten years from now.
I'm talking about personal hopes and dreams outside of raising the family. If you dream of achieving something and are on a pretty good way to accomplish that dream and all of the sudden you throw your life away for your family.. that is silly to me. I mean, there just has to be a fair balance.

I also can't picture myself raising a family even ten years from now. But I also can't picture having a family preventing me from having my own life. I hope that in the future I will have a family but at the same time I will be able to achieve my personal plans, hopefully with my future family's support.
 

Flipmo

VIP Member
Staff member
#23
Sofi, you can't find a job and you can hardly wipe your own ass. If someone gave you a child, I'd call social services on your punk ass and plant china white in your sock drawer.

Biotch.
 

Casey

Well-Known Member
Staff member
#24
I never had dreams. I had goals. I've achieved many of them. Others, I'm on a path to achieving, others are in the initial planning stages.
 

S O F I

Administrator
Staff member
#25
I'm talking about personal hopes and dreams outside of raising the family. If you dream of achieving something and are on a pretty good way to accomplish that dream and all of the sudden you throw your life away for your family.. that is silly to me. I mean, there just has to be a fair balance.
OK, I see. The way you phrased it, it implied that raising a family doesn't correlate with hopes and dreams when it very well can. Also, saying that there has to be a fair balance implies raising a family AND pursuing hopes and dreams. But in the first sentence, you're saying you're throwing away your life if you're raising a family.
 

ARon

Well-Known Member
#26
I never had dreams. I had goals. I've achieved many of them. Others, I'm on a path to achieving, others are in the initial planning stages.
This. I remember one time I was bullshitting with a friend and said Martin should have said I have a goal not a dream, cus that mother fucker is taking action upon his goal. Basically it came down to dreams are for weak people, goals are for people who make things happen. Saying dreams just sounds better I guess. To me it's a stupid saying that stuck around way too long in our society
 

Synful*Luv

Well-Known Member
Staff member
#29
And that is reason to look down on people who are moms?
I don't look down on moms in general. I dislike moms who have stopped being individual people and are only moms. I also dislike moms who have "oops" babies, especially if they have multiple "oops" babies. Lastly, I dislike moms who have children and are ill prepared to be parents.
 

masta247

Well-Known Member
Staff member
#36
How dare a mother put her child before herself
We're jumping from one extreme to another. It's natural that child's life will usually be more important to a mother than her own one. We're saying is that it's a bad idea to give up your own whole life and sacrifice everything - it's much more that you should. While indeed a mother has to make some sacrifices she doesn't have to give up on all of her biggest goals and dreams. It's not good for anyone, for her child too.
 

Pittsey

Knock, Knock...
Staff member
#37
Life is about being fluid and adapting to the situations. Your dreams shouldn't be rigid anyway, they should be continually evolving. The dreams of an 11 year old are very different to those of a 22 year old. You may not achieve the dancing or *insert childhood dream* but you might achieve something that you are far more proud of. Others looking in may feel differently. But they are your dreams, so your opinion is what matters.
 

S O F I

Administrator
Staff member
#39
That's not what I mean.
You said you look down on moms who stop being individuals when they become moms. How is one supposed to interpret that?

Child rearing is complicated. Some hopes and dreams take a back seat when a child is born and rightfully so. It's a 24/7 job. Pursuing goals and "individualism" that you so dearly cling to is possible but quite often to the child's detriment. Hence why moms (the good ones) stop being "individuals" (whatever that means) and take care of their kids. A fair balance is possible but it's not easy. I wouldn't look down on a woman who set her law school aspirations, medical school aspirations, Janet Jackson aspirations, etc aside to become a mother if her goal is to become a mother. To me, it seems that you see that as a negative thing.


Not everyone out there aims to be rich and world famous. Some dream of humble, stable jobs and happy families.
 

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